Monday 22 December 2008

17 PASTIMES/ENTERTAINMENT/SOAP OPERAS

Soap Operas are the modern day Shakespeare. It is a very powerful form of television, entertainment that unites a nation. Soap operas can be so powerful that in 1990 during the finale of the Eastenders Dot Cotton poisoning plot, the Bard himself materialized in the front room of No.11 Nettlecombe Avenue, Portsmouth. Shakespeare then proceeded to throw a Marks and Spencer ready meal for one at the television, shouting, “Gadzooks! Nick my son you is going darn!”
The current world energy crisis is just a governmental conspiracy to keep the proletariat distracted. The truth is that reruns of Crossroads are on standby to be plugged into the National Grid if a shortage occurs. One episode of a wheelchair bound Sandy pining after Miss Diane provides enough energy to keep the kebab shops in South Wales open for business on a Saturday night. An Eastenders Omnibus can power London for a day, and any scene where Deirdre Barlow is seen flexing her neck is equivalent to 20 medium sized wind farms.
Interestingly, Hollyoaks is the only soap that takes energy away from the grid.

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