1 TRANSPORT/PUBLIC TRANSPORT/BUSES

If you require a more social journey to your destination, you can take a bus. A bus is a large diesel transporter containing a various number of seats depending on the specific design. Local children are employed by the bus companies to make your journey more entertaining with hilarious head-slapping antics and distributing a diverse assortment of fragrances from cheap poppers through to belch air. Beware though that under British Transport law, the employee responsible for moving the bus around (the 'bus driver'), is forced to follow a variant of the regular road users set of laws called the 'highway c*nt' and are, among many other rules, forced to park in yellow boxes, only stop to pick passengers up nine out of ten times, and attempt to fling the more elderly passengers down the middle of the bus once they have boarded (called 'old fagot tossing').