72 MYSTERIES/PUZZLES/WHY MOST EXOTIC ANIMALS TASTE LIKE CHICKEN

Noah, son of Lamech, the tenth generation after Adam, had a ferocious appetite. It is well known that he was 600 years old when God told him to build the Ark. Less well known was that he also weighed 600 pounds. Because of his obesity he could barely move and didn’t actually build the Ark. He had his sons, Ham, Shem and Japeth, erect the boat around him and made them herd ‘every living thing of all flesh, two of every sort ‘ on board. It was going to be a long trip and he wanted to make sure he had plenty of provisions. 40days of rain and then another 150 days of ‘waters prevailing on the earth’, Noah was getting through all the really tasty animals at an alarming rate. Like all fat people, Noah was very sensitive about his weight. Consequently, his wife and sons didn’t like to interrupt his eating, but were getting concerned that eventually all that would be left was chicken and things that tasted like chicken, and not even Noah could stomach that. The Zang Zang bird, the most delightful exquisite flesh that could heal all wounds, had been eaten on the first night - Extinct. The Tuba-beast, the sweetmeats of which could cure blindness, went to make a Tuba-beast and kidney pie during week two - Extinct. Not even the Kensit Bear escaped the clutches of Noah’s epicurean adventures, which is a shame because it was a lot cuter than the Koala. Wolfed down with a gallon of mead – extinct.
Eventually all the delicious meat was gone – forever. Two hundred days and two thousand tantalizingly toothsome types terminated. Selfish fat bastard.